Had my interview with Guiding eyes. Didn't go well. I swear, I have performance anxiety. I'm not too worried though cause they don't know anything about using the GPS and dog in tandom so it kind of crosses them off the list. Leader Dog's camera's r being rented out so I gotta wait for them to be sent back to Leader before getting one. I almost wonder if it'd be easier to go to Seeing Eye. They have better vet services but I like both schools so I'm not sure. Guiding Eyes suggest I use Wilda and do an evaluation if I wanted to appeal their dicision, but I don't feel right bringing WIlda back into work after so long. I bet she could do it, but I'm sure she doesn't want too. Talked to Allison today she's definitely getting away from him. Got a movie I ordered on line today and watched it. One of my faves. Well write more when things r more eventful
Well I just found out my best friend in the whole world lied to me. She's always trying to cover what her fuckface husband does and I'm tired of it. Apparently he doesn't like me and doesn't want Al hanging around with me. So she told me she left him, and that her phone was shut off to get away from him. Well I tried her number cause I had a feeling I was being lied too and it was on. I feel like I can't be mad at her cause she was there when Rhonda's fuckface husband assaulted me, but I feel like she should've told me the truth. I know she was probably trying to protect me from finding out her husband doesn't like me, but I'd rather hear the truth. I've always been the girl who wants to hear the truth. I feel like I don't have a companion who has my back through and through and it sucks. I consider her to be my besty but it makes me wonder if she considers me to be as good a friend. I love her and don't wanta be mad, but I am hurt. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to work this out? If it were anyone else I'd have no problem confronting them and/or cutting them out of my life, but I feel like this situation is different. Any suggestions would be good.
This entry may seem a little negative, but I've had a few things happen that I wanta write about. Well I feel like one of my friends and I r on each other's nerves. She says I take too many wrisks and that I walk around doing whatever the fuck I want. Thing is she's negative and has bad anxiety so doesn't take wrisks. She says I should always prepare for the worst case sinerio, which I used to do but thought I was being negative so I changed. I chose not to do this anymore cause it made me look like I always expect the worse and I'm sick of alienating others. I was supposed to see Allison, my best friend from Vegas but plans got canceled. She says she's left her husband and I hope to god it's true. He's such a fucking jerk! He always yells at her and her daughter calls him "Oscar The Grouch." U know it's bad when your kid calls u that. Anyway she says she's moving back to Chicago and I hope that's true as well. I worry cause I know she's a forgiving person and the way he yells at her and controls her is just not cool. Wilda's birthday party was also posponed cause the family has to go to Kansas for the end of June. So yeah, today was kind of a bummer. Ok, just wanted to get today off my chest. I have an appointment with Guiding Eyes so I'll write to say how that went. Did I mention that I found a Wiccan circle? It's called The Circle of The Spirit Tree. I enjoy it. Well I'll write more later.
So I found an easier way to post to LJ. I go through dreamwidth cause it's more accessible and I can have it sent to my LJ account. In the past 6 months or so I lost both Wilda and Phoebe. Wilda retired cause she was just not wanting to work and Phoebe started pissing on the furnature. It's weird without my girls here. I attended Leader Dog's mobility class and did really well. I am currently accepted to Seeing Eye, have an evaluation with Guiding Eyes and am waiting on Leader Dog to send me a camera so I can make the video and send it back. In other news, I found a really cool place called Fusion Brew where I go for tea and they have the best teas! I also found out about a site called blindmicemeggamall where I can download discriptive videos. I'm cooking on my own now and enjoy it. I just hate doing dishes. I'm wanting an IPhone but have had trouble figuring it out. Granted I only played with 1 for an hour at the verizon store, but I really need more time with 1 I guess. I'm now on obillify which helps me with my depression, so that's always a good thing. Monday I'm going to see Allison and her little girls. She had a baby this past year so I finally get to meet her! Well that's about it for now, will post more later.
This is 1 entry I will write as public. I'm sick of other blindies who think they're better than the rest of us. We're all the same, and whether u like it or not, we all have similar obstacles at times. Yes there blind ppl who play the helpless role and r weird, but there r the ones also who r doing their best to be as independent as possible. There's nothing wrong with networking with other blind ppl if u have questions, and there's nothing wrong with getting together and advocating for what's right. So to those who do everything without dealing with other blind ppl, more power to u. To those who only hang with sighted ppl, more power to u. Just remember that we all come from different backgrounds and cultures so judging and ridiculing isn't always the way to go. I dated a blind person who hated all blind ppl, yet learned all their life skills at a school for the blind. How laughable is this.. If blind ppl r frustrated and wanta try to advocate for things to change, they have a right. If u don't like it, don't join us, but don't judge. I'm sure most blind ppl answer to a higher power and most religions preech not to judge. Just my thoughts. I respect that some blind ppl don't like blind ppl and think all we do is wine, but if that's the case, don't talk to us. I'd rather not know these kinds of ppl than have them judge me. Thanks.